Rude awakening

“After you.”
“No, after you.”
“Oh, but I insist.”
“Ah, well if you insist. Thank you, you’re most kind.”
“Oh, not at all.”

And with reciprocal smiles and nods, those cheery chappies pass, harmoniously through the door. Isn’t that nice? Agreeable? Convivial and reassuring? And most importantly, so very typically British? Well it might have been, back in the day. Post second World War days, perhaps, when Britain was rebuilding and finding its feet in a changed world. When the population looked out for, and looked after, friends, neighbours and even strangers. Long-lost, salad days when everyone knew their place and minded their Ps and Qs. When working men doffed their caps and called posh toffs guvnor or sir, and working class mums reminded rosy-cheeked children that, “Good manners cost nothing”. When men held doors open for women and helped old folk across the road, and people of every class – in the main – attempted to live by the maxim that “Manners Maketh Man – or Woman”.

Those were the days. Or were they? And what are we Brits really like today? Are we even likeable? Many, at home and abroad, argue that we’ve become the Basil Fawltys of behaviour when compared to our European and Scandinavian neighbours. They reckon we’re rude, short-tempered, ill-mannered and boorish – and that’s just with each other. After all, most French make a point of saying “Bonjour,” when passing a stranger, while the Spanish will offer a friendly “Buenos días,” and the Dutch will give a warning tinkle of the bicycle bell and smile a “Goede morgen” as they pass by. It’s the same, many say, in other nations across the channel too, whereas we Brits keep our heads down and say nothing. How many times since international borders reopened after the pandemic have holidaymakers returned to these shores to say, “And the people! They were so nice, and polite. And so friendly. I don’t even know my next-door-neighbour.” Statistics back up that claim. Many of us wouldn’t know our neighbours if we were standing next to them in a queue – or barging past them, for that matter. But is the rest true? Have we become ruder and more disagreeable, or is it, once more, a matter of seeing the past through those rose-tinted, “best behaviour” spectacles?” And what of our European and Scandinavian friends? Are they really so much nicer, more helpful, more polite and more patient than us? Come on, hurry up, we’re waiting for an answer!